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I've been exceptionally swell over the last few days (fourth day straight without a hint of migraine), so I decided to do something I've been wanting to do for a few weeks.

I'm not going to say what it is, since I tend to jinx it. Even writing this could jinx me.

Oh God.

But seriously (I am serious about jinxing it), if I remain pain-free I should be able to complete my plan on Friday. I wanted to go in today or tomorrow, but I found that they don't open until 12, and they're usually booked out until at least 1, possibly 2pm. It'd take an hour to complete (or more)... I can't expect mum or dad to wait around all day and then wait in town for an hour or more.

On Friday they open at 7am, so I could go in by about... 9.30/10am, and be done for the day before lunch time (which is awesome, since I'll probably want to eat afterwards).

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Oddity
23:00 Sep 30 2014

Once I tricked my parents into waiting for me to get this tattoo that took six hours, they refused to take me again, so I tricked my uncle into waiting five hours for my chest tattoo. Ha. I'm awful. They were pissed.

Also, I am not trying to guess at what you are referencing.

Also, also, I am so dead serious right now, I have this same fear. That talking about positive situations can ruin them and that talking about something negative will cause it to come to pass.

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I just read something relating to "Pray the gay away", but this time it was aimed at transgender people.





... What?

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Oddity
21:41 Sep 30 2014

I'm starting a think the straight away camp...got any good looking hetero dudes you could recommend?

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Amenthewick
04:55 May 01 2015

Touche to whoever wrote that or its a reflection of themselves in which I pray them away and I'm straight. Transgender takes care of everything that is missing in our DNA don't they get that? I agree with "....what?" DNA fixes itself. But if you wrote this on their website you would be blocked and oppressed for an opposite view immediately.

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Not that I'd use it for that - but it has potential for other games I may want to play in future (woohoo Steam sales!). I don't like the idea of clogging it up with that sort of stuff... but I do like the idea of being able to run games through it.

You need to reduce the quality of graphics, but otherwise it's good. It even connects with a PC adaptable xBox controller (which I have).



I can't wait to get one - they look utterly brilliant.



The only negative thing I've read about it is that the cameras on it (front an back) can't zoom or focus on close items - if you want that... buy a camera (or in the case of a ranter who wanted scanned documents), a scanner. People will next complain that it doesn't have a slot on the bottom where you can have paper printed out.

I am so irritated, I was watching a show in which a woman is convinced that a white-tailed spider caused necrosis of her leg.

She admitted she itched the bite with dirty hands (her lower leg was bitten while gardening), she did not seek medical care at all, and didn't care for the wound at all.

Despite the terrible hygiene she employed (or failed to employ), she blames the spider for the (mild) necrotic state of her leg. She admitted to knowing the wound was infected, but still didn't seek help until necrosis had set in.



I'm fairly sure that any wound that's covered in dirt and infested with germs is going to turn necrotic if not medically attended. You had goddamn puncture wounds you didn't care for - I hate it when people blame their wounds on other things, denying it was THEIR ACTIONS that caused necrosis. She could have prevented it easily.

A study of 130 bites from the same spider showed no proof at all of that spider venom directly causing necrosis.



It annoys me when people start campaigns to raise awareness of things like necrosis and white tailed spiders... when those people were actually suffering necrosis due to bad wound-care.

She had photos to 'further her cause' and one man was apparently bitten by quite a few. Those spiders are known to cause blisters at worst - which is what she showed - extensive blisters. That made me angry because she was banging on about how bad the spiders were - if you get bitten a few hundred times, and have the blister reaction, duh, there will be a few blisters!

Blisters are not necrosis, however, and that person was actually smart enough to seek medical help.

I don't get why she mentioned it, other than to try make "sensational" news - and that annoys me - incorrect and false propaganda of serious medical issues.

I have a week to wait... I really don't have the patience to wait at the moment.

If I get the job and subsequent training for it, I will be given a week to finalise everything. Pressure.

Canberra gets into negative temperatures quite easily. While the rest of the country has temperatures of 80F and above... Canberra's predicted to be as low as 30F today. Apparently snow in the actual city itself is rare, but it snows yearly for a couple of months in surrounding areas of the city.

I have a bad feeling I'm going to find summer down there to be... unpleasant. I know they do get some high temperatures... but they also get quite a few freezing nights and days.

I feel like I'm moving to Antarctica. Heh.

Okay, maybe that was a bit dramatic...



My house-mate is passionate about body modifications... this is a match made in heaven.

Lease signed, half my stuff packed, lining everything else up for storage/donation, contingency plans being drawn up for stuff I may not be able to take with me (but that I will be needing later), employment for the new state being sourced... ♥



On Tuesday I have an interview with a potential employer who is stationed in Canberra (the interview will be here). If I am successful, I'll be moving two weeks sooner than planned, and I will start training for the job a day after arriving. That's pretty full-on. Seriously.

If I get in, training will be finished before December, and then I'll be employed within a nursing company.

Next Friday I'm off to Brisbane... and the week after, I could be off to the ACT. That's such a weird thought. I will have been in QLD, NSW and the ACT all within a span of a week. That's an incredible amount of travelling, dear god.



I REALLY hope this job opportunity works out. It'd be great and may possibly count towards relevant experience within Médecins Sans Frontières, and future University/College.

I hate the notion that minimalism means you need grey cement walls, or raw wood/unpainted. You must have no possessions other than a bed and essentials for food.

I hate that notion.



My take on minimalism is... sparsely living, with few possessions - but those few MEAN something. It's also not the repression of hobbies - I like books and stuff associated with different aspects of Buddhism - I'd keep those things neatly, and without decoration. To me, minimalism is the absence of unneeded clutter. I removed books I wouldn't read again, as they were clutter. I only kept my favourites (about 3 books all up). I don't disagree with decoration, but to me, having every space in your home crowded with meaningless items is... clutter. Books aren't clutter for me, if I like the book. Things like 17394895 pillows on your bed, however, that's clutter. They're... over-crowded aesthetically, and just... ugh. When I have the liberty, I sleep with three pillows - one under my head, one each side of me (it's so comfy) - but beds that have upwards of 5 pillows... that's what I mean about "clutter". I always try store the excess when not in use, not display. Having things just for the sake of having them as a decoration, not serving any practical reason at all... ugh.



I hate the stark take on minimalism - I don't see the problem with having walls in brilliant colours and hues... I think stark, cold minimalism can't really lend itself to happiness, a warm home or somewhere I'd ever feel comfortable. My minimal ideas are... not spindly or uniformly square, drab furniture, I like things in rich chocolate, deep orange and purple. I like things to look warm... but without clutter.

I don't know, man, I just... I like comforts, and I like brightly coloured things, but I dislike over-stuffed homes, and I dislike "industrial minimalism", if you'll forgive the term. I like minimalism... without taking it overboard. There's nothing wrong with having bright colours and covered fittings (I saw one minimal house that had exposed wires, for god's sake).



I'm making a fool of myself, while trying to explain my feeling of this - so I'll have another go - I don't believe minimalism is in the fashion statement of industrial-style minimalism, I believe in the mental and emotional freedom of it.



I quote (and this is excellent and sums up my feelings pretty well): "Minimalism is a tool that can assist you in finding freedom. Freedom from fear. Freedom from worry. Freedom from overwhelm. Freedom from guilt. Freedom from depression. Freedom from the trappings of the consumer culture we’ve built our lives around. Real freedom." (http://www.theminimalists.com/minimalism/).



Freedom, because I feel I won't miss what I don't have - and as I've been emotionally detaching myself, it actually feels GREAT. I think the thing, the misconception that you must throw away EVERYTHING that's not literally essential for human survival is stupid, because what I look for in minimalism isn't absence - it's complete content in being non-consumer - in the feeling that I don't NEED material possessions, and the ones I have hold meaning that contribute to my happiness. Happiness is essential to life.

There's nothing wrong with creature comforts.







All this comes in the wake of packing my bags. I noticed all I'm taking with me is my book on Tenzin Gyatso, my Loonicorn, a handful of CDs and my yoga mat. I'm only taking clothing besides that (and my medical text books).

It feels incredibly liberating.

Sketching my mandala is going incredibly well. It looks all disproportionate, my circles are... well, not circular, but the feeling, the idea is there.

I'm thrilled.

I have a long strip of golden paper that I'm drawing on, I may try find nice circles I can trace and... I need softer pencils (that do darker lines), as these are too hard and the lines are too light.



I hope I can get a sketch book, decent pencils, some crayons and a protractor/compass tomorrow. That'd be awesome. I was considering uploading my designs... but I want them tattooed on me, not on someone else. That's one of my main issues in using an internet-found design - originality.

I know I can draw what I want, and I know a tattoo artist can touch it up, so I am determined to make mine original.

I haven't been able to find a mandala flower that I really 'click' with... so I'm going to buy a compass and try draw my own. I was alright with geometric art when I did it last time... which was years ago. I'm sure I can manage this, and if not, I'll find a tattoo artist who can bring my ideas together.

There's quite a few designs that I like (all have a basic theme I like), so I'm going to try print them out, and then go from there. I may be able to digitally manipulate an image that I like enough to satisfy my need.



I found a gorgeous mandala, the inside has little elephants. It's reaaaaallllly cuuuuuuteeee.



While typing this, I've found a good starter template... so I'll scale it down (it's enormous), copy and repeat the image onto a sheet of paper several times and then take the pen to it. ♥

I'm debating having none of it black - I love the pink, blue, green and yellow I've seen.

I'm learning not to put all my eggs in one single basket... and since I'm expanding my ideals and goals as such, I'm looking at other things I may be comfortable doing as a career.

For starters, if I can't get into Midwifery, I'm going to finish my nursing and work for the Red Cross. I have also been looking into Médecins Sans Frontières, of which I meet majority of the criteria for (I haven't travelled or had relevant field work yet).

I also speak decent French, and I could pick up whatever I need (as Médecins Sans Frontières is clearly a French organisation).



I'm not going to let University rejection ruin my life, because there's so much more that I can do that's morally, ethically and personally fulfilling. Not that I've been rejected - I'm just preparing myself for a possible outcome when I apply next year - it's not the damning end of the road for me.



I am not sure if I'm self-sacrificing enough to commit myself to Médecins Sans Frontières just yet (and I'd have at least 5 years before they'd consider me), but I could work for the Red Cross (taking blood) within a couple of years.

Médecins Sans Frontières offers extremely good benefits to their 'Médecins' (as it were)... it's a good option.

To the mosquito: "Shtop biting me. D:" said in the smallest, tiniest voice...

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Judgement
04:56 Sep 27 2014

I've been telling you you're cute for like, 4 years.

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Owlish
05:14 Sep 27 2014

♥

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I love comforter sets. I am looking on Macy's (they seem to have huge sales right now) and they have some lovely floral and printed (and even the plain are nice) comforter sets.

The sheet/pillow sets are also amazing.

And so are the quilts.

And just about everything.



I like PillowTalk (an Australian bedding store), which sells really nice stuff - quilts, comforter cases, pillowcases and much more. I can make those sorts of things myself, but the issue is nice fabric - which is expensive - so it's actually cheaper to wait until there's big sales and buy it all pre-made at a store like PillowTalk. I can take it back if it's faulty, whereas I would loathe to mess up fabric that's up to $30-50 a metre if I sew it myself. I know Spotlight has nice quilt sets, too... I'm sad I missed their massive sale.

I've had a crap bed (I'm currently sleeping on a thin, bad mattress covered by a yoga mat) for so long, and crap sheets... it'd be so nice to buy nice things like that when I move. Crisp linens and nice, comfy comforters... I miss it.



Quilted, standard, satin, taffeta, silken, cotton (Australian, Egyptian, Italian...), flannel, microfibre... oh man. ♥





It's funny that Macy's is like the American version of David Jones/Meyers and yet it's cheaper to buy from Macy's and have it shipped to Australia than it is to buy from the Australian David Jones/Meyers.



Speaking of which, I'm considering applying for a position at David Jones.

I love busy days... I love lazy days... I love every day. Even though I get bored out of my mind at times, I still respect that I currently have nothing to do. No appointments, no class, no work. I'm trying to savour it before I take up something I've never done before - work and full-time study.

Awwww yeaaaah. ♥



Tomorrow will be busy.



In another week, buses will resume (it's school holidays and for some asinine reason, public transport stops) and I can go out more.



I'm ridiculously cheerful.

I found unbelievably gorgeous septum jewellery... at an unbelievable price. By that I mean the stuff is ridiculously expensive. I'm talking hundreds of dollars. Hundreds for a single septum ring.

Oh, they're lovely - tribal, feminine, the range is rather large, some are adorned with gems, they come in gold and silver and other precious metals... which is why they cost so much, I assume.

They're magnificent, and I want about 10 of them, but I'd never buy something like that for myself. For the price of them, I could get a rather extensive tattoo (or series of tattoos). I'm not even kidding. Out of all the ones I like that they sell, the least expensive is $52. For one ring. I could get a whole new piercing for that price, or half an hour of tattooing.

Oh my god, they're so nice, though.



I was originally trying to find a nice flower stud for my nose, and I can't. I don't want one with a gem in the center of the flower, and I'm only interested in the circular-screw-in type. And it must be 18g. I hate the thin, flimsy 20g "bend it yourself" types, and I hate the ones with little balls or spikes on the end (commonly called 'bone end') that you're supposed to force through your piercing. It's beyond me why you'd try traumatise a healing fistula by shoving a ball/spike through it... and yet people continue to make them, because people continue to buy them.

I'd settle for a nice ring with a flower on it... but nasal rings are mainly flimsy 20g (or in incredibly bad cases - 22g) pieces of crap.

I don't understand why people would buy 20g, as you're usually pierced at 18g at the least, due to rejection risks. If you're pierced at 18g, don't use wrongly sized jewellery, for god's sake.



Oh, and it also mustn't be too high off the skin, because it hurts like you wouldn't believe when you get a nose stud caught on a towel or a shirt/sweater.





While writing this, I've found two studs that MAY be acceptable, but for the price of them... again, I could get a whole new piercing.

I have found one single septum ring that I like (and is reasonably priced), but I'd have to go to a piercer to get it in and out of my nose (it's a CBR)... which is not appealing.

I finally got around to watching the last 8 episodes of The Walking Dead (s4), and... wow. "The Grove" - wow.

That was an excellent episode.

I was beyond impressed, and sad. It was sad, but god, the things that happened were just... wooow.

Someone I rejected (he asked me out knowing full well that I'm dating an American) once scornfully asked if I think Australians aren't good enough for me (as if Australians or Americans are some superior nationality).

I denied the notion and stopped talking to the person.



I feel like I lied to the person, because essentially, Australians aren't good enough - because I'm currently dating someone. I don't care where you're from - I'm dating someone - which means I have no interest in any other nationality on this planet, as I am already dating someone.



Don't turn the fact that you've been rejected into something about nationalities - my boyfriend just happens to be a yank. He could be a yack for all I care - and it wouldn't be out of preferences towards yacks that I'd continue to date him - it's because I love him... and his adorable yanky accent.

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Oddity
18:51 Sep 23 2014

I want to date an Australian, I have a thing for dudes with accents.

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RoyalZombie
19:43 Sep 23 2014

It's actually Yankee, but your way is better I think. LOL!



Yes, Australians aren't good enough for you, because you certainly couldn't turn him down because he's a complete TOOL!



Never mind the fact that you already have a boyfriend!

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Judgement
22:57 Sep 23 2014

It's pronounced ah-loo-min-um.

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Oh maaaan. ♥ Things are working out so well right now - everything is falling into place.

I know of course that things may not work so well when I move in 5 weeks - I may not be able to secure a job for a couple of weeks after moving, and things will be stressful, but right now, I feel euphoric.

I was worried about a few little details that I've ironed out... I've ironed out really well. Damn, I'm good. :D

Polls that ask the questions "Should free members be able to turn off biting/stalking/should they be able to lurk/should they be able to change names" - make me think that the people making those Polls have absolutely no idea how Premium Membership works.

For clarification; I pay money and get features you don't. If you no pay, you no get. It's a pretty simple concept. If you want Premium features, be Premium. If you don't want to pay, shut up and be happy with the site as it is, as you can already access a vast majority of the site - you just can't turn off/on certain things, and you have less coding options.



It's incredibly annoying when half the Polls are relating to people opinions on making Premium Features apply to Regular Members.

Seriously. Just shut up about it. It's not going to happen.

There's a programme on SBS about the 60's (in the US). The first episode was about the "British Invasion" of music - The Who, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones and so on. This week's episode was on the end of segregation.

Holy fuck, I nearly cried.

The power and the passion of the people, people joining together... oh man. ♥

The last words on the episode were "There are some children here, as old as five years old. In 50 years, one of these children may one day be the first black president of the United States." (paraphrased). It's been 40-50 years since those words were said.

Gave me chills, man.

I Google Imaged our new house. It's all looking good. There are cyclist pathways and stores nearby, public transport and the university is ridiculously close to the house (two streets away). The inside of the house is fantastic, it's being freshly painted and having extras added to it in the space of the next month. Rabbits are perfectly fine - although we'll have to plant some grass for them or go for a walk every day and find some and steal it/pluck it, since the yard has none... or buy harnesses and take the rabbits for a walk and feed them grasses along the way. Either way.



I have no idea how to express how blooming excited I am. It's a round, curving road, I could go jogging/cycling in the mornings. There's also a large park about 100ft from our cottage... augh. Everything works so well. The Uni has a gym with cheap membership, so I could jog/ride over there... too much awesomeness. Seriously, too much awesomeness.



I'm extremely grateful for this amazing opportunity.

I feel like all holidays have come at once.

I... didn't really think we'd manage that one. I thought we'd have a chance, but not a hugely solid one.

I've been... numb about the prospect of this all. Somehow, while being optimistic, I still had this nagging doubt that it'd all go through. Now it's okay. It's all gonna be okay.

We did it.

In... a little over a month, I'll be... ah. ♥

Tangled, stir-fried vegetables and black tea. I don't think it gets better.

Ah. A slip of the tongue... or rather, a lapse in my control. Someone was asking for advice on how to cheat a drug test for work, and I made a comment (similar to one made by others) that the person doesn't deserve the job if they want to cheat and lie, and use recreational drugs.

Some fool then said "At least they're natural drugs!" and... I called them "stupid". I said something like "Then you're stupid, too." - no cussing or swearing, or anything more than that.

I was removed from the forum.

More than anything, I'm disappointed in myself, because I usually really enjoy the forum - and because I generally don't let myself make comments like that. "You're stupid" isn't exactly nice - it's not that I feel they're... less than me, I just think they make stupid choices, and have little regard for law or the health and safety of those around them.

If anything, I think they're... I can't think of the word. Irresponsible and selfish? Yeah.

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xBellaNova333x
06:04 Sep 21 2014

The forums here?

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Owlish
06:26 Sep 21 2014

Can you be removed from a forum here? No? Then not the forums here.

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New place being viewed this weekend. High possibility of house-buns if we get the place.

Augh. ♥

I just read the stupidest thing... good lord. Apparently humans can only withstand a certain amount of pain. Apparently child-bearing women go above and beyond this while in labour.

Stupid. It's saying that all women experience the same amount of pain while birthing. I've seen women SCREECH while being examined, and I've seen others not flinch a muscle. Not even bat an eyelid - while both the woman in pain and the one unaffected are at the same stage of dilation.



This isn't taking into account the different positions for birthing - and fittingly enough for the inaccuracy of the statement, the picture supplied was of a woman on her back, no elevation, at all.

That's not taking into account things that may individually help - aromatherapy, lower back massage, soothing music, meditation, specialised chairs/birthing balls, birthing in hyrdo or hypno, natural, assisted, c-section...



So freaking stupid. It makes me mad when those things are propagated around to pregnant women. It does nothing but scare them and make them think that there's only one single way to birth a baby - which is so far from true.





Although this annoyed me - it's make me realise that choosing Doula Services before Midwifery is a GREAT idea on my behalf, because Doula Services puts huge emphasis on EDUCATING women about their choices in birth.

We finally lit one of my Chandan. They are a bit strong but it was windy, and thus okay.



My shirt was wet when I retrieved it after swimming - I'd kicked so hard that the water splashed my bag, which was a decent distance away. All I could do was laugh - which then made me laugh in itself, because it was an annoying problem. I wore it anyway, threw my cardigan over the shirt and it dried reasonably fast (thankkkk yooooou Spring heat!).

I didn't work about it, I laughed a decent bit, it dried before I realised... it put me into a fabulous mood.

I did something awesome today... and yesterday... and the day before...

I'm grateful I went swimming today. I was knackered. I now know that swimming before yoga will be a terrible idea. Heh.

Auuugh, I forgot how exhausting swimming can be. My legs refused to work properly, going up and down stairs was a nightmare.

It was great, though.

My skin is all dry. I can't wait to rid myself of chlorine.

I could be so lucky as to have everything sorted within a month. If so, I'll start applying for jobs in Canberra within the next two-three weeks (experience leads to the assumption that it takes roughly two weeks for employers to reply).





I'm so freaking excited. I... don't think I can really express how happy I am at the slow increment in this.

Being sent living quarter propositions always lifts my spirits - today was no exception. If we got one place... my room would be bright green. Haha! ♥ One is much nicer, comes furnished and includes internet. It also includes the possibility of pets (small dogs and cats are accepted - they shouldn't have a problem with two small bunnies).



As generally happens, nothing went to plan today (don't know why I keep making plans, really) - I went to the beach and saw whales.

I did something quite gracious.

I'm tired.

Augh, so many nice houses.

It frustrates the hell out of me when people criticise the Green party when the person criticising has no idea what the Greens stand for. Last electoral year, they didn't waste extravagant amounts of money campaigning - they kept it as an investment towards their policies - which I think is a great idea.

As such, one of the few ways you could read the policies and plans of the Greens was/is online.



I doubt, very, very much, that the people who are so vehement in their criticism of the Greens actually know the party line. I doubt these people, who claim that Green voters are a bunch of morons (thanks, dad!) have actually researched every party that was running, and read for what they stood for. I did. I read through Palmer United, The Australian Greens, the Liberals and the Labour. The Green party has an exceptionally well thought-out and funded asylum seeker policy that would be an amazing thing to implement. It wouldn't cost billions of dollars per year, like the current policy does. The Greens plans wouldn't breach International and Humanitarian laws.

There's a few other things that they stand for (can't remember at this moment) that really, really impressed me. I was blown away by the thoroughness of it all. They had their budget planned and their proposed plans settled months before the election. They were crisp, clean.



The Labour party is a mess. The Liberal party is... lets not even go there. The Palmer party has a few good points... and a few bad.



It really makes me annoyed when people comment on the Greens without reading into them. It annoys me when the general idea is that the Greens' idea of Education is "Teaching kids to save the whales", when people think that the Greens idea of "Defence" is "The Sea Shepard" (which they do not endorse in any way, shape or form), or when people think that "The Green party of Australia" is somehow short for "GreenPeace".

It's not.



I dislike being called "small-minded" or "stupid" for the fact that I voted Green, when I think politics is innately precious, and that as a result, every party should be looked into.

I chose what aligned with my idea of a good nation - one that cares about the future of the planet, the people in our nation and the people outside it. I don't see the problem with a party that's open and accepting of other cultures - that's a good thing, I think. Fostering fear about asylum seekers and refugees is not going to help any foreign relations, at all (as we're now seeing).



If you know nothing about a political party, you have no right to criticise it.

I like the idea of collecting weird Buddhist things that I'll never use for their real purpose - like a "meditation wheel". They look nifty. Some are gloriously coloured, adorned with stones and gems. I'd never buy one (or aspire to buy one) that is gilded to such an extent, I'd rather a plain one (brightly painted or burnished).

I also want a... singing bowl? I don't know what they're called - they're metal bowls that you run a special... chime? you run a chime around the inner edge and it produces a lovely, clear note that's surprisingly soothing. I'd use that for its intended purpose - but they're too expensive to buy.

Heh.

And yet, how easily it's forgotten. "Have compassion on my nerves" is a line from Pride and Prejudice. It reminded me of this.

I need to have compassion on myself. I need to remember that I'm not perfect, and even though I strive for considerate reactions, sometimes it doesn't happen - and that will serve as a learning experience. There's no point in making myself upset about it. Compassion for myself is as precious as compassion for others. That sounds selfish. Heh.



I read once that music and dance are unnecessary and badly indulgent. I don't agree. I don't think that music and dance are essential to life, but I think they're something beautiful, and in the case of music that's mainly instrumental, pure - like Niyaz's " Arezou" - I don't really get why - but it seems wonderfully pure.

Being able to dance, laugh and sing happily aren't bad things. Those two things, done with so much passion... I don't think they can be "bad". Music and dance are indulgences, but not detrimental. They bring joy and feeling, acceptance and in some cases, cultural understanding and inclusion.

I've metaphorically slapped myself out of my funk. Finishing University, I've had nothing to do for the last 2 weeks. I was generally sick, tired and bored.

I've been alternating between meditation and educating myself on various subjects over the last few days.



Metaphorical slap - I'm still applying for jobs. I'll never quit applying- even if it gets me down at times. In the meantime, however, I am going to take up swimming again - as I mentioned previously. Even if I can't get a job in the next few weeks, I can continue conditioning my body, at an increased rate. If I can find a gym that doesn't have lock in membership (I'm not paying $10-15 to attend once a week), I think I may start with weights or something similar. The University may be an option in that regard.

I've been embracing discontent for the last two weeks - it's about goddamn time I do something about it. I've been so dissatisfied with myself, so I'm doing something about it. It may not be specifically related to hunting for a job - but exercise will benefit my body and give me something to focus on that's positive.

If I can, I may even join a walking club. That'd be great motivation, I think, walking with a bunch of old ladies. I wonder if I could get into town early enough... if not, I could take a planned route that should take me about an hour-two hours.

It's storming tonight and there's been lightning for the last 10-ish hours - I hope this means the pool will be empty tomorrow. That'd be just great.

Ugh. UGH. I am making considerations and I'm really... fuck, I don't even know. I'm excited. I'm not happy.

I'm making... not plans, but I'm considering what I'll do if my UC application is knocked back next year. I should have a full qualification by then, in the relevant field, but if I get knocked back... I think I'm going to get back into Enrolled Nursing and then work for/train with The Red Cross.

I'm excited for this, but I'm also dreading the course. I know I can do the course again and do as spectacularly well as I did last year - I know I'm capable of absolutely flying through it - but I'm just nervous. I also feel bad because I'm liking the idea of being a Red Cross Nurse and a Doula at the same time, and then getting the Midwifery qualification at a much later date.



It'd be stupid to ignore the possibilities.

I'm plotting. It's amusing me. I discovered that the yoga instructor I like has a studio on the same street that the pool is on - since the pool's recently reopened for the summer, I'll go swimming for an hour and then do an hour and a half to two hours of instructed yoga.



I haven't been swimming in a while... I hope to pick it up again - three days a week. Tomorrow I'm going, and yoga is on Friday, so I'll go again, then. I may also go swimming on Wednesday, because I know I'll be terribly out of practice, and I want to be sure I won't die afterwards in a yoga class.

Unf.

I can't wait.

The number of hours I've spent playing Morrowind this last week are just sad... but I don't normally play that much, and I'll be back to normal once I finish the game (which will be soon) - I just need something to do - I apply for jobs, my education next year is pretty much settled - I just need gainful employment.

I cannot wait to cook myself some dinner. Ugh. I'm simple. A bowl of steamed vegetables and a home-made thick, creamy mushroom sauce... I'm so simple. I'm going to spice the sauce with freshly ground pepper and maybe some oregano... ugh. I'm then going to smother my vegetables in it. I'm ridiculously exited. I'm happy because we have cream that spreads a lot when heated up, so I don't need much cream at all to make something that's beautiful.

I previously planned on putting pork squares into it, but the last few days (bar this morning), I've been completely meat-free - and enjoying it once again. I'm trying to re-teach myself that I can make lovely things that are healthy and meatless.

I'm excited.

Excited.

It's not useless, but sometimes fees that way.

1 tin of red kidney beans, half a tin of chickpeas (I was not prepared, I didn't soak the beans or chickpeas we already have, so I was lazy and purchased pre-soaked tins), half an onion, 1/5th of a small bell pepper (red), about 6 large button mushrooms, a sachet of Mexican spices (again - I was lazy, I didn't look up a recipe for the spice combination - just got it pre-selected), an avocado, organic corn chips, a jar of salsa...



Jesus Christ.

I made vegetarian nachos last night, and they were AMAZING. I put two thin slices of cheese over the top of my creation, to finish it, and it was beautiful. It made much more than I could eat (I could't even finish my small bowl), so it'll feed me for the next 2 nights, at least.

It's nearly 8am, and I'm STILL feeling full from last night - I want wholemeal quinona toast with blackberry jam (the real stuff, not this artificially flavoured and sweetened bullshit) - and I can't fit it in, despite the fact that I ate dinner roughly 15 hours ago.



Unf.

It was so good.

That was probably the most bizarre conversation I've had in months... Hahahaha. ♥

COMMENTS

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Oddity
22:30 Sep 12 2014

Oh my god, I used to have this massive friend named Mel. She had fiery red hair that she kept close shaved in a buzz cut, and we were really close. She got into an argument with a really skinny African American girl and said, "look here niglet." I was shocked.

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POST COMMENT

I just said I wasn't tired, and my eyelids start to descend... Damnit.

Our electricity was off all day, which led to mind-boggling boredom and intermittent napping. There is no way for light to naturally brighten my room (I have windows but they face the wrong way, and are covered by a varandah roof), so reading was out, and so was going through the dregs of my possessions, which is a shame since it was a whole darn day that was wasted.



Despite having next to no sleep (I finally fell asleep at about 3am, and woke up only a couple of hours later, and then continually woke up every half-hour to hour...), I am feeling remarkably awake and 'with it'. I had headaches/migraines for most of the last week, craved sugar and water, and was unbelievably tired... even after sleeping huge numbers of hours. I ate so much ice cream and so many cookies within a space of two days. I ate something like 15 double and triple choc-chip cookies, and a 2kg tub of cookie'n'cream ice cream.

Oh god.

In two days! :c

I try to never eat processed sugar and manufactured stuff like that. I even wanted watered down Coke - COKE! I never drink that - or want it - ever.

Despite all that sugar, I slept for roughly 14 hours in one day, after the sugar binge. I was sick. Augh.

I'm extremely glad I feel better. I don't feel guilty for eating that much sugar (over two days, 2383 calories - not including the cookies) - I was sick, it happens.



Now I want pickles. Heh. I want sharp flavours to clean out my mouth and my belly - hot, black tea and pickles/gherkins. Yummy.

I'm done. Man, I put up with your crap for years, I know what's coming and what's happened, but... that one little thing, that one little scene... I know the books are pretty brutal, I've read them all, I know, I know... and yet I just... I can read it, but I can't watch it - and the books aren't THAT great, anymore. It's all so negative, it's just... I can't find enjoyment out of those sorts of books anymore. There are beautiful, brilliant characters, like Tyrion, but even he doesn't make it worth it, anymore.







The way she flopped and convulsed after she was stabbed... I cannot do. It literally took me MONTHS to psyche myself up for that scene - I wish I'd skipped the episode altogether. The whole episode, not even just the Red Wedding, because other nasty shit happened - I wish I'd done without completely.

I know G.R.R Martin comes up with devious and heart-wrenching stuff, but the stabbing of her wasn't in the book, and... augh. I didn't like that she died too.

It's been almost exactly 3 years (I got it on the 10th or 11th) since I got my cherry blossom tattoo... ugh. If I manage to get myself hired, I think I'll put my tattoo ideas on hold for a re-do of my cherry (plum) blossoms. Three years, and the entire tattoo has faded terribly. Some previously coloured spots are completely gone, the center of two of my flowers are pink scars from where she continually dug the needle, and... I'm just not happy with the fact that the only colour in the tattoo are pink and black, when I wanted (and was assured of) something bright and vibrant, yet soft. Sure - I got "soft" - so soft that it's faded in a ridiculously short amount of time.

It's not that I don't take ink well, it's... ugh. She drew what I wanted, I agreed, she tattooed, I told her to stop at one point, as I was happy with it, and she didn't. She then told me to come back within 6 months if I needed it touched up, I returned within about 5 months, asked her for a touch-up... and she quoted me at $150-200 - when she insinuated it was going to be free (like most touch-ups within tattoo parlours are).



Ugh.

I don't mind the branch itself - apart from the fact that it's solid (faded) black - I wanted warm chocolate browns, honey and golden syrup. I wanted it colourful. I wanted green leaves, HELL - augh - I wanted cherry blossoms, and I got plum. Cherry have splits in the petals, which are very distinctive. Plums are rounded (like my tattoo).



I'm frustrated.

Uuugh. Stores that want a "short video uploaded" with an application for a job can go get fucked.

I think I got a bit ahead of myself, there. Heh.

They have so many little Dutch for sale in my area... none in the ACT. :(

I'm seriously considering buying one just before I move.

Virgin Airlines accepts cats and dogs ($55 fee), and I think they MAY accept a bunny if I ask them...

I'll see about it tomorrow. So much to see about tomorrow.

Talking about getting a Flemish rabbit... oh my god. xD

They're so big and fluffy and cute, but the maintenance of them, and the amount of money you'd spend on food for the giant bunbuns... They're cute.

I... dwarf rabbits... unf. Mini lop... OMG. They're so goddamn cute that they're almost literally TOO cute!



My favourite breed is Dutch rabbits, though. They come in caramel and chocolate and "cashmere" and black and white and omg, they're adorable.

There's so many of them in the pet store in town.



A good idea for hutches was proposed... I love it. We're taking shabby chic to a whole new level. There's "bohemian" hutches (mostly DIY, too), that are made out of low, old television tables. You just take out glass from the doors (if it has doors - and replace with wire), or add walls, and then line the inside with soft and fluffy things, food bowls and rabbit toys.

You can then stick the litter box underneath, if the table has legs... excellent.



This is one example-

http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/67/bf/05/67bf05b46d14e2d31ebf4742b2c344ed.jpg



I hope we get minis, they're so little and cute. We could get mini Dutch! :D

I'm thinking in terms of storage... Flemish would be too hard to house. They would need a legitimate bed - like a dog bed.

Plus you should always own rabbits in pairs... TWO Flemish? God. I'd have more bunny than I think I could handle.

I think the epic saga of The Migraine is drawing to a close.



I'm listening to English music, drinking English tea, talking about English things, considering watching documentaries made by an Englishman... It's coincidental, I swear.



Queen, tea, royal family, Doctor Who, and deciding whether to watch Stephen Fry makings... I clearly must be feeling better.





I want a rabbit. A RABBIT!

I love the look of Dutch rabbits - they're just gorgeous.

Augh. If I wasn't moving... argh! There's a position open for dentistry, which would be awesome. I'd feel terribly guilty if I got the apprenticeship, and then moved away, two months later. I assume the apprenticeship is much longer than 2 months, so I'd be moving with a half-completed (well, not even half-completed) apprenticeship... and I doubt I'd get a good recommendation (because they clearly plan to hire their staff for long periods of time - not a couple of months).

I'm sure other opportunities will open up.

AUGH. I still don't have an answer - it's been nearly three weeks for some. Over the last three weeks I've sent in roughly 8 applications... augh.

Since it's coming into Christmas time, most of the jobs being advertised are "Christmas work", in retail. That means they won't be hiring until at least October, even though they're advertising now.

There's also a huge hardware store opening in town, so there's roughly 30 positions opening up (not joking), and... ugh.

The job doesn't actually OPEN until January next year, and they pay... only average wage so it's not worth staying here for the POSSIBILITY of a job within a hardware store, that pays meh wages and is a conglomerate company that I dislike, both morally and ethically.

I wonder if they will let me take photos...

I bet they will if I tell them it's promotional for their organisation.

Maybe that naivety - maybe it's a reflection of the change within. Not 'within' in a general sense, but within my own personal beliefs.



Without meandering - I'm saddened, quite a bit, by one of the kismets that was recently changed - namely, it called for the complete 'nuking' of an entire nation. The kismet was changed - I assume the person got the acronym incorrect, and fixed it.

Either way - whether they meant the entire country or a specific group of people - mass-killing is never the answer. Killing in any way is never the answer. It won't bring people back. It will not make you feel better. It will not stop people making martyrs, heroes, vendettas. It will perpetuate the culture of hatred - nothing more.





This probably makes little to no sense.

What I'm getting at is that it makes me really sad when I see people with no hope of dreaming for a peaceful solution. I know it's probably a little too late for it in the current situation that was mentioned - but... fighting solves nothing.

Good lord, that's so sad. It's been roughly 5 years since I've played violin. There's a store in town that sells them, beautifully made and decorated, for that 'beautiful instrument' price, which is not beautiful, but totally understandable.



I wonder if there's any second hand ones around...



I'd love to learn lute. I haven't seen a real lute before. I'd love to have one. My boyfriend collects books, I'd love to collect weird antique-style instruments. Heh.

I want a sitar. ♥ And a cello. And a double bass. and a viola. ♥

I've had no internet for most of today. I was extremely impatient at first, and then when we found out that the whole network was down... it all just shifted. I figured okay, I can't do anything about it, ringing up and continually asking for updates will get me nowhere, I may as well try do something.

I had a shower, drank tea, played cards, attempted to play Morrowind... in the end I decided to watch some of my favourite episodes of GoT, and RIGHT as the episode ended, the internet pinged back on. I didn't mind that it was over three hours since we called the company, and over an hour since they said it'd be back on - I'm just glad it is - and hey - I enjoyed watching GoT. It gave me the courage to possibly watch the ending of the third season (I know what happens, I just have been depressed about it, and not wanting to watch).



And who are you, the proud Lord said,

that I must bow so low?

Only a cat of a different coat,

that's all the truth I know.

In a coat of gold or a coat of red,

a lion still has claws,

And mine are long, and sharp my Lord,

As long as sharp as yours.



And so he spoke, and so he spoke,

that Lord of Castamere,

And now the rains weep o'er his halls,

with no-one there to hear.

Yes now the rains weep o'er his halls,

with not a soul to hear.

I know I say it fairly often, but I just don't understand that.